Coming And Going: Guide To Entering and Leaving Parties

So, you don't want to be the one who holds up the party, but you don't want to be the first person there by an hour, either. Here are some general rules to keep your party-going experience chicly timed.

Don't arrive at a party unannounced.

• If you decide the day before the event that you want to attend, but did not RSVP, do not show up at a party without first having called the host. Apologize for not having responded in a timely manner and express your interest in attending. At this point, it is up to your host to say yea or nay.
• At larger events, a finalized list is usually given to whoever tasked with manning the door.
• A quick phone call will save you the embarrassment of showing up only to be turned away.
• Likewise, your host has enough to tend to and frankly no time to address your causing to stir at the door.

Don't be the early bird:

• A time is stated on an invitation for a reason. Your host will resent it (no matter how gracious he/she may act.) And, for your own sake, nothing takes the glamour out of a party like arriving to a host scrambling in her slippers, still trying to find the perfect place for her peonies.
• Don't be the first to arrive and don't be the last to leave.

An Excerpt from Party Confidential: New Etiquette for Fabulous Entertaining By Lara Shriftman and Elizabeth Harrison